Thanks for this, Jen Hinkkala. You made it very clear and easy to understand and gave words to feelings I have had for a long time. I will share this with the friends who mean well when they say the things that you tell us society paints as a picture.

 

Well done, writing it. And bravo.

 

Not all mothers are nice

Adding to this, something I found on the reddit community blog for estranged adult children is this:

 

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Same. I come from a very sexist family, but basically the assumption is that my main worth comes from my looks, so any weight gain is a big no no. Basically the only thing they ever talk to me passionately about is weight loss’.

‘I remember my mother telling me in high school that my legs were starting to look like sausage casings. Not that it matters, but I was the #1 spot on our varsity tennis team and my legs absolutely did not look like sausage casings… Although, it’s disgusting to even validate that with a reply.

‘Anyway, I never knew how messed up some of this stuff was until I went to college and then met my husband, who was just like “jesus christ, that is so inappropriate.”

This is why some of us choose to make clean breaks, which was the topic of a set of writing prompts for reflection in the sometimes-when-I-feel-like-hosting eWorkshop, The Mirror. 

 

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